Part of the fun in maintaining a blog is glancing, occasionally, at the search terms that led to said blog. By now, I am used to the fact that not everyone is going to land up here using search phrases like “hail the great awesome genius Baradwaj Rangan” — I get that.
I get that someone is going to come here using this: “is jai married in raja rani movie” or “sex love and revolution of jodha akbar” — the heart’s cockles are immensely heartened when I see people taking an active interest in movies, even if they seem actively interested in only one thing.
Don’t believe me? Then how come I get visitors curious about “www.nattu katta naked hip women.com” and “father sex with his daughter when she’s mother absences hot scene from tami movie”?
About the latter, I mean, I think I see pretty much every Tamil movie out there, and I’ve never come across the remotest instance of a plot that might permit father sex with his daughter when mother absences. Also, I genuinely hope that it’s the “movie” part of the phrase that led to my site and not the other part, the implications of which are too disturbing to think about in this nascent year.
But even more troubling is this search phrase: “pk movie raat ka gunah and garam bistar”.
pk is possibly the sweetest of films, those dancing cars notwithstanding. You have to marvel at the inventiveness of the truly dirty mind, which senses smut everywhere.
PS: Yes, yes, I realise that by publishing this post, I am, in effect, letting the search algorithms know that this blog contains phrases like “naked hip women,” and that future seekers of naked hip women are, again, going to land up here. But hey, I need my morning jollies, okay?
PPS: Just making sure that there’s at least one Bitty Ruminations in 2015.
Baradwaj Rangan 
Shankar V
January 7, 2015
ROFLOL!! But of course, you could also choose to prevent search engines from indexing your pages. That will prevent future visitors with those phrases. But why such elaborate effort that will disturb your morning jollies? 😉
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Rajesh M
January 7, 2015
I’m pretty sure your level of frustration at the kind of search terms that seem to lead people to your blog pales in comparison to the levels of frustration the guy who used that search term and found, of all things, YOUR BLOG!!
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Ashutosh
January 7, 2015
So, I tried to use those search terms in Google. I checked until the 10th page of results. None of them had a link to this blog. So, anyone who used that query to get to this blog must have gone further than 10 pages… that is some very committed trawling. But when such a committed person abandons their quest and decides to read this blog… I never knew BR’s writing had *that* kind of hypnotic power.
Alternatively, a Frequent Reader of this blog leaves cookies lying around. Google picks them up and promotes a vaguely matching article from this blog up the search results. Frequent Reader realizes the futility of his quest and applies for asylum in this blog as per usual.
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Devarsi Ghosh
January 7, 2015
Saar you reviewing Ugly or not?
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christybharath
January 7, 2015
it’s strange isn’t it, how sexual references work themselves into every blogger’s SEO anomalies. the most popular one for mine is “”pics nudist swimmer”.
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Iswarya
January 7, 2015
Er… “heart’s cockles are immensely heartened”??
Is that some obscure and complicated cardiac procedure, or just a casual case of mixed metaphor? 🙂
P.S. Sorry to be picking on even a post meant for morning jollies. Couldn’t resist. 😀
P.P.S. New-Year-Non-Resolution: Must somehow get rid of my Grammar Nazi reputation.
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Ramsu
January 7, 2015
I’ve been there, man. It’s fun to theorize who the searcher could be.
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Deboshree
January 7, 2015
I can understand how it feels. It might be a good idea to share some of the search phrases I have come across. We might figure out a pattern in all the ugliness…
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olemisstarana
January 7, 2015
Umm… that’s how I found your blog… not saying which one…….
Jussssssssst kidding… :-}
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Ram Murali
January 7, 2015
Paavam Sir Neenga…nalla velai idhu “bitty” rumination…”bittu” rumination nu title vechurundheenge naa paavam ena gathi aayrukum!
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Vidya Murugan
January 7, 2015
You won’t believe this.. but I was thinking of doing a post on the same lines.. It’s amazing how unrelated search terms can lead to your blog..Sometimes it freaks me out..
I have even tried putting those terms and searching and searched for more than 10 pages or so and never found my blog..
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reviewpuram
January 7, 2015
“father sex with his daughter when she’s mother absences hot scene from tami movie”
Nool Veli? K Balachander? Pushing it too far, am I?! 😮
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Venu
January 7, 2015
“pk movie raat ka gunah and garam bistar”
My guess is the searcher made a typo. He/She was probably looking for a “pak movie ….” and not “pk movie ..”
Also, this. May be you already know?
https://www.google.co.in/?gfe_rd=cr&ei=FnWtVLLaBOig8weY8oCIBQ&gws_rd=ssl#q=raat+ka+gunah+and+garam+bistar
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vengayam
January 8, 2015
This whole thing is a rip off from this.
http://madhulikaliddle.com/2014/03/22/the-funny-side-of-blogging/
Don’t say it is serendipity/soincidence or “great (wo)men ….”
By the way that post was far funnier
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ThouShaltNot
January 8, 2015
Coming on the heels of the debate about defensible free speech, some might find it amusing that search results (topic of this bitty rumination) are now considered constitutionally protected free speech ( ok, only in the U.S). If that sounds like a head-scratchy tidbit, this was decided in a California court in response to the company being sued over “preferential ordering” of the results. The counter to that suit was in arguing that search results are in essence “editorial judgements”. So, a search engine now is deemed a person, much like corporations were earlier deemed people.
Maybe, that explains the whimsical nature of what you see for results here (or maybe not) 🙂
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burcidibollyreview
January 8, 2015
Now that you mentioned this, I looked at the search terms people used to get to my blog. Nothing as funny as these though. Here are some of mine, they are so strange.
“does ali zafar believes in ghosts”
“zombie kya hai”
“ranbir sad hugs”
“does allu arjun have afro hair”
“telugu dance on plane”
“intertenment dogi image”
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Shalini
January 9, 2015
I don’t remember how I stumbled upon this blog way back when. Likely someone posted a link to it on rmim or something. Must say I don’t understand the appeal of these analytics. Google is always urging analytics on my You Tube channel on me and I just couldn’t care less.
Happy New Year. 🙂
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Sev
January 10, 2015
This is a bit off topic but would you mind writing some sort of a review of the 80s movie Tridev. I have been watching it on Youtube and honestly, after having grown disinterested in modern Bollywood masala, I can’t help but really enjoy movies like Tridev and Ram Lakhan etc (80s hit masal movies). And for whatever reason, I can’t seem to explain why I enjoy it to my younger or foreign friends, and I know were they to watch it, they’d be not particularly interested, unlike say a hardcore western masal movie like Star Wars, which I can enjoy even though I am not the traditional scifi fan. And how sexy was Jackie Shroff in the 80s? And how effete is the visibly macho Sunny Deol’s voice? Shroff completely stole the macho stakes from right under Sunny’s nose (in my opinion) 🙂
Cheers! And great post, btw.
Sev
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Anuja
January 10, 2015
Bwahahaha! I am not surprised that those with a predilection for the prurient wind up here! BR can easily be mistaken for a steam merchant if not an outright purveyor of porn given that he recently discussed the ‘out there ‘ sex scenes he has seen, proceeding to expound at length and in lascivious detail about an organ which should NOT be confused with the ear getting severed off etc.
If memory, serves prior to that he had wondered about how much sex shown on screen was too much sex. And to set the fears of readers who feared that BR was sounding a tad prudish at rest, he all but promised a typically racy piece on ‘Blue is the Warmest Color’.
Finally, leave us not forget the comments section where anything sexually outre goes including Rajini’s Lingaa! And all this from his more recent posts alone! The archives will turn up truckloads of erotica no doubt! Oh BR you tease you!!! 😊😊
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Iswarya
January 10, 2015
BR:
I vaguely remember watching on TV long ago an oldish movie where Janakaraj plays the drunk father who attempts an incestuous assault on his daughter. I remember that the next morning, either the girl or he (or both) are shown as committing suicide.. I wonder if anyone recalls what this movie is called. Have you ever watched this?
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Iswarya
January 10, 2015
OT:
Nice template. Much more compact, and the blue tinting is certainly cooler on the eyes.
P.S. Hope this template is lighter and would load faster on my mobile phone.
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brangan
January 10, 2015
Iswarya: Thanks. Felt it was time for a little spring cleaning 🙂
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venkatesh
January 10, 2015
Not sure about “much better template” – but definitely easier to rate up/down comments, without having to login.
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Ashutosh
January 10, 2015
I love the new layout. It’s sharp. Do we need both the upvote and like buttons? They seem to be doing the same thing…
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brangan
January 10, 2015
Ashutosh: I know. I’m not crazy about the Older Posts button either, and wish I could take it off. But let others weigh in and then I’ll take it all into account and do some more sprucing.
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Iswarya
January 10, 2015
I am not sure how it works, but I think the up-votes work without a WordPress id too. In which case, it would be more useful than the ‘Like’ button.
(Too lazy to sign up just to “like” posts..)
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venkatesh
January 10, 2015
Iswarya : Yup thats exactly it,
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Ashutosh
January 10, 2015
@brangan: the older posts button loads new posts a couple of times, and then the third or fourth time, a wheel starts spinning and doesn’t stop for over ten seconds… I then have to refresh the page and try again. The feature seems a bit flaky. Not sure if others have this problem (I run Chrome on a Mac).
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Bala
January 10, 2015
New theme looks nice but…did the blog not have a name after moving to wordpress ? The BARADWAJ RANGAN in bold is konjam too much 😛
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Iswarya V
January 10, 2015
Er.. Regret my early enthusiasm. Just opened this on my PC and things are pretty messy with this new template now:
No older post opens directly with the comments. Additional clicking and waiting for comments to load.
Archive very difficult to navigate. (Full text of strictly one post at a time.) Even the “Older Posts” button invokes only one more post every time. Very annoying.
No chance of taking in a quick view of all recent posts.
No “Related Posts” under the main entry, which means no serendipitous archive discoveries to treasure. 😦
ALL CAPS for commenters’ names looks too formal. (Of course, that’s a very personal grouse.)
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Santa
January 11, 2015
Some trifles about the new layout:
1. The new color scheme is pleasant, if a tad too understated.
2. In the older layout, a few of the most recent posts were shown immediately below the latest one. I do miss that. Now we see only their headings in the lower right on scrolling down.
3. Also, there seems to be no ‘Comments’ link under the title for the older posts. Wonder if that is intentional or an error.
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Vijayakumar
January 11, 2015
Another feature that I find missing, and one that I use a lot, is the ‘Search’ button. Did you remove it intentionally?
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Ashutosh
January 11, 2015
Is the star rating for articles new or am I just noticing it? I vehemently protest against it 🙂 You don’t trivialize movies by rating them on a scale of 5, and people shouldn’t be marking your reviews either!!
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Iswarya
January 11, 2015
You seem to have reverted to the old template, though with the up and down votes options. That’s really good. Maybe you can stick with this a little longer and go for a clean-up when it really begins to look cluttered and inconvenient. A of now, this is just fine. And the vote-up is a welcome addition, I’d say 🙂
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Rahini David
January 11, 2015
BR and Ashutosh: Having both like and upvote options is not redundant at all. For there is a difference between being a numb nut who wants to wordlessly “like” a stance and being an anonymous Upvoter.
Also there is the downvote option. It can be wildly useful at times.
The downside to this option is that sometimes we give more importance to the number of upvotes vs downvotes rather than read the comments properly. I have seen that happening in some blogs.
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Ashutosh
January 11, 2015
@Rahini: I was more thinking that keeping the upvote and removing “like” might not be a bad idea… upvote = like.
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Ashutosh
January 11, 2015
@brangan: Does the upvote and downvote actually affect the placement of the comment (like reddit)? If yes, then it’s a useful feature. Otherwise, upvote/downvote only gives opportunity for hatemongers to wildly downvote something… one of the reasons why facebook doesn’t have a ‘dislike’ button I guess.
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Rahini David
January 11, 2015
Ashutosh: Not really. It is often nice to know the stance of known commenters too. For example, in the misogyny thread, I expressed my thanks to many fellow commenters by just liking their comment where there had given me a compliment. This will not be possible with just the voting system. Right?
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Iswarya
January 11, 2015
@Ashutosh:
But, altering the sequence would spoil the flow, right? I think this is good as it is.
Btw, this new format is good too. Mainly because of my partiality to sober blue shades. 🙂
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Ashutosh
January 11, 2015
@Rahini: Right, OK so I guess one will use an upvote if one agrees with something and like if one… likes something.
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Ashutosh
January 11, 2015
@Iswarya: Right, changing order would have made sense if comments were grouped as threads.
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