Readers Write In #484: Why can’t HE do it?

Posted on September 6, 2022


By Hari

5 years back, after the birth of our second born, me and my wife went to her gynec to discuss the possibilities for birth control. That is when she told my wife why can’t he do it. It is a complex procedure for you, if it was a Caesarian we could have done it then itself. But now it will be a 2 day affair (and good time for recovery) but for him it will be just half a day.

That is when it dawned on me, how that thought of me doing it did not dawn me at all. Why is it that the wife is the one who is the default choice to do it. My dad had done it 40 years back after I was born, so why not do it myself.

So we consulted the doctor whom the gynec referred to and set the ball rolling. The doctor confirmed that the procedure will not take more than an hour or so and I will be out of the hospital before I know it.

On the day of the operation, I went alone in a cab and got myself admitted. The support staff started on the pre-operation procedure. The local anaesthesia was given (but only mild dosage) and the operation started. It was a painful procedure, I don’t deny it. In no time, the procedure was over and Dr said that he had successfully done it. And that I can go home after a couple of hours. That was it.

At the time of the discharge, the hospital staff thanked me stating that not more than 5% of birth control is done by men. And if possible asked me to encourage my friends to do the same. And here I’m 5 years later, posting this in BR’s blog of well read menfolk, when the time comes, to think about doing it yourself instead of leaving it to your wife. There is no shame in it.

Postscript:- When I came home and told my wife that I was deeply embarrassed to have the thing out in the open, she said now you can empathise with us women folk when we go for delivery. She added – “every one and her momma will come over, touch our breasts and this and that as if we have no say in it.” I started empathising with her starting that day 🙂

Post Postscript:- I’m no doctor and in fact I suck at anything related to medicine, and I’m writing off what my memory tells me, so in case there is any medical error do forgive.